2 Corinthians 13:6 English Standard Version (ESV) I hope you will find out that we have not failed the test.

Sixty years ago I raised my hand at an altar call. I had no idea what I was doing and I had no idea why I was doing it. I cannot even tell you now sixty years later if I was right or wrong to raise my hand.

Now with decades of obedience of faith under my belt I can say what I did not get that fateful day so long ago.

No one came along beside me and asked what was going on inside me that had led me to raise my hand. If they had, I do not know what my answer would have been then.

Like any baby just being born I could not see, everything was a blur. I did not know who to talk to about what had just happened nor did I understand why it had happened. At this moment describing what happened to me that day is irrelevant because I have had a lifetime of pondering to try and answer it for myself. I still do not have a good answer.

What I can say with confidence is what did not happen that should have happened.

I should have been discipled.

I was pushed into a leadership role in the country chapter of the Baptist Youth Fellowship. That never should have happened as I had no idea what being a Christ meant at that time. I was expected to lead others when I had no idea of what was happening to me as an emotionally confused young man. I was not confused about being a boy, I was confused about being a Christian.

The sad truth of it is that at the age of 75 I have never been discipled.

I have however discipled others successfully. When asked to develop a discipleship program I failed to achieve that goal. Because I had not been discipled my only experience was in what I had done to disciple others. That was not what leadership wanted.

My discipleship method was to show others how being a Christian works. Not to teach them, to show them.