That is not a matter of judgment so much as it is understanding.
Picking up where we left off yesterday I cannot let this comment go without explanation.
The Pharisee, standing by himself, prayed thus: ‘God, I thank you that I am not like other men, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even like this tax collector.
This is as plain as it gets in saying people are judgmental. Ask any of those sinners about the Pharisee and it is likely they will label him self-righteous and they wouldn’t be wrong. There are little hints as to his attitude in this verse and some other translations indicate more.
In the ESV standing by himself indicates an attitude of setting himself apart, pride makes him unapproachable, standoffish, a pariah of his own making.
Other translations said he prayed about himself and with himself leaving God out of it. That is a form of self-talk and not the intentions behind prayer at all.
Let us be real here and admit there are people we come across in this world that make us uncomfortable. For whatever reason it is just how we feel. I have my own private list but I will not share them. We should keep our own counsel there.
The problem is that by holding ourselves aside we cannot share the gospel with those who might need it the most. We can tell ourselves not to cast our pearls before swine but we then judge someone as swine.
Love the sinner not the sin sounds fine but how do you love someone (share the gospel) if you are standoffish?
We need to be approachable without giving off airs of judgment nor approval. That is not an easy thing to do if we harbor deep seeded disgust. While I am a sinner saved by grace, I should not show my sin just to prove my point. That is like having a drink with an alcoholic while preaching abstinence. It is hypocritical.
So how can we judge a righteous judgment and serve our God?
Begin by avoiding the Pharisee’s mistake and involve God in our prayer life and listen to what God has to say before we act.