Job 13:18 Behold now, I have ordered my cause; I know that I shall be justified.

How’s that working for you there Job? Sadly I can see myself in exactly that spot alongside Job. I did not want to see it, but once again, I must confess my sin. I get to do that in an open forum because that is where I serve God.

Three times this past week I have written devotionals that held agendas. I was passionate about what I saw and like so many of us, I was about to set things right. It was only by a good conscience that I felt something was wrong in what I wrote. I sought wise counsel, I prayed and I deleted the files.

That wasn’t enough. Three is the number of man, and if I repeat a behavior at least three times, then it is time to examine cause and effect. What within me was causing this repeated behavior? So I sought the Lord to understand agendas from the human perspective.

We see injustice every day. We have our hearts pulled towards compassion for victims. We want change because nothing that is being done seems to make things better. If I idly stand by and do nothing, am I not part of the problem? In the end, if you look to the issue of taking up agendas, it is about justifying myself.

Being a Kingdom dweller and a servant of the most High God puts me in an area of responsibility to which I must look to God first. I do not get to have the luxury of self-indulgence. I don’t get to make this all about me. My failing isn’t about what I see or in what I feel. My failing was in that I didn’t take it to the Lord first.

2 Samuel 22:31 As for God, his way is perfect; the word of the Lord is tried: he is a buckler to all them that trust in him.

I failed to hold it all together because I stopped trusting God.