Colossians 2:18-21 English Standard Version
18 Let no one disqualify you, insisting on asceticism and worship of angels, going on in detail about visions, puffed up without reason by his sensuous mind, 19 and not holding fast to the Head, from whom the whole body, nourished and knit together through its joints and ligaments, grows with a growth that is from God. 20 If with Christ you died to the elemental spirits of the world, why, as if you were still alive in the world, do you submit to regulations— 21 “Do not handle, Do not taste, Do not touch”
Asceticism is self-imposed regulations we choose for ourselves. They have no bearing on a spiritual life in Christ. Self-control is not the same thing as obedience of faith. They are not the same as those things we have learned to distance ourselves from for health reasons. A diabetic understands the need to control what they eat for health reasons. That is not asceticism.
In the spiritual relationship we have with God asceticism is a restrictive behavior that replaces listening to the Lord with self-insistence. It says that we have to choose what is right for ourselves to show ourselves that we love Christ. Puffed up without reason by a sensuous mind is pride in performance in regulations that are not imposed by God.
In the world we have a fear of performance of love, that we will be rejected if we do not “perform”. We fear that the ones we love will replace us. Performance is an act, it is not real. This might be one aspect of the fear John speaks of in 1st John.
1 John 4:18 English Standard Version (ESV) There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love.
His love is perfect and it is His love that ends performance fear. He loved us at our worst. Why should He stop loving us now that we are better? We are better. We are better off with Him than without Him.