1 Corinthians 13:5b Love is not selfish

But that isn’t what the word says. The words are “seeketh not her own”. Paul’s use of the Greek word heautou is a reflective pronoun which is a genitive case (dative case or accusative case) and carries with it a need to assign gender. His or her matters not, it is the reflective nature of the word that causes us to look inward towards self rather than God’s attribute.

It is the only time within these descriptions of agape love that the genitive case is used. Perhaps that is because God is selfish, not in the sense that we are selfish but all you have to do is look to the first commandment to find a most singular selfish moment. You shall have no other gods before me. (Exodus 20:3)

God is selfish in this sense for our sake, that none should perish. (John 3:15) The use of the reflective pronoun is intended to make us examine our motives in selfishness. I love my wife, I do not want any other man to have her. That selfish moment is born of commitment and the oath we took towards each other. There are other moments within our relationship that are selfish by nature which are not born of commitment or oath.

We have agape love in us but the other types of love also reside alongside agape. Eros and phileo are still very much a part of our daily experience. Both of those types of love carry with them a certain amount of selfishness. An imbalance of selfishness in either type will ruin a relationship.

Philippians 4:5 Let your moderation be known unto all men. The Lord is at hand.

1 Corinthians 13:5 Love does not behave unseemly

As I looked over the various translations I discovered they were all correct, even though different. How do you expect agape love to act? If you broke those expectations down to one negative reflection of expectation, then love is not what you expect. Expectation defines our view of what is most important to our understanding. Translating this verse into any adverb puts a pin hole in the box where you have placed God.

Take the first aspect of God, God is love. Reverse it, love is God. God is unchanging, love is unchanging. Agape love will always be agape love and nothing else. Unseemly is the direct opposite of glory. God’s glory is His reputation, His appearance, how He presents Himself to us, especially in the form of His Son Jesus Christ. Unseemly means that it doesn’t look like Jesus.

There is a long list of adverbs describing how Jesus Christ acts. Which adverb is appropriate is reflected in the moment as He will always be appropriate in the moment. His love will be appropriate and consistent with who He is and how he loves.

If there is any comparative between agape love and how we act, it would fall into that category, consistency. I can be agape love in any moment, but am I in every moment? Try as I might, the answer is no. Knowing that should not stop me from growing and learning.

1 Timothy 1:5 (NASB) But the goal of our instruction is love from a pure heart and a good conscience and a sincere faith.

It takes all three to successfully reflect the abiding love of God.