Psalm 38:5 My wounds stink and fester because of my foolishness,
One of the side effects of anxiety is much like the stink here in Psalm 38:5, it is not that anxiety itself is a sin, but the effects of anxiety can be identified, like the stink of a self-inflicted wound.
I recognized one effect that told me that my anxiety needed to be addressed. It was selfishness.
Selfishness makes it difficult to hear the Lord clearly. Not impossible, just more difficult.
With me it manifested in a need to be right and to be understood. It wasn’t enough to be right, I sought affirmation. Doubt crept in when I didn’t get it. Doubt is a cancer to faith.
Thank God someone loved me enough to smell the stink and ask “What is that?”
We all need help and who better than someone who knows you best. Good accountability partners can tell when we are “not being ourselves”. They question, prod and pry until light shines upon the problem.
I have said it before and it bears repeating, we all need accountability partners. Not just someone to talk to but one who has gained your trust to the point you can share the worst parts of yourself without feeling judged.
When I say my symptom was selfishness, I owned it and that is my confession. That does not mean that when others are struggling that selfishness is their symptom. Nor does it mean that selfishness means one has anxiety. Other wounds can produce other symptoms.
I would love to believe that I could work out all my problems on my own with the help of the Holy Spirit but when we are having trouble hearing, it is not His fault. That is a sign of something being wrong. That is why His Word says “be subject one to another”.
Who do you trust?