John 1:1 In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.

This morning I went to Exodus 3 to visit Moses as God revealed Himself. What I was searching for were words that might express how God revealed Himself to me near death. I found very little to compare because Moses lived in a different time and God’s will for that moment was different. But I did find one note that rang true, “I AM THAT I AM.”

I AM means exist, repeated twice with purpose in those moments with Moses, but for me once was enough. God revealed to me that He exists. But now I am stuck with this experience without any concrete way of proving it to anyone besides myself.

Words fail to describe the indescribable. I cannot even tell you how I felt. In His presence every part of what makes me human was stripped away. All there was in that moment, if you could even call it a moment because time also was stripped away, was His presence. There was nothing left of me to feel anything, think anything, express anything, to the point that being in His presence was everything.

I had no questions. I needed no answers. There was no physical exchange between us. I had nothing to offer, not even thought. No pain, no suffering, being me without a past, not even concerning myself with a future. I saw nothing but He was there. I felt nothing of my old self, but I was there. He was indescribable.

Then Jesus said, “I want you to live.”

How did I know it was Jesus speaking in pure spirit, into a part of me I could not describe? I do not know, but I knew in the same way I did not have any questions to ask of Him. This unquestioned knowing that was not based on knowledge but rather presence. No great mission calling, no direction, and no plans, just live, as if living would be enough.

It is in the living that we need words.