Mark 9:35 And he sat down, and called the twelve, and saith unto them, If any man desire to be first, the same shall be last of all, and servant of all.

Does this passage mean that if you desire to be first you should serve all and in that way you will become first? That is how it is interpreted by most people. But is that really what it says?

I see the problem as being desire. Scripturally God used men that did not want to serve. Anything from “I can’t.” to “I won’t.” was said by men like Moses, Gideon, and Jonah. They were used mightily by God to prove God’s will for mankind.

I will share my human instinct in what I see in this verse. The flesh is after all flesh. Suppose I were to cut in line for a popular movie that was about to sell out. An officer called to keep order would pull me out and say, “Back of the line!” My desire would to be first, not to be left out, I would have no consideration for anyone else other than myself. As I went to the back of the line I would both resent the officer and everyone in line before me.

Philippians 2:6-8 Who, being in the form of God, thought it not robbery to be equal with God: But made himself of no reputation, and took upon him the form of a servant, and was made in the likeness of men: And being found in fashion as a man, he humbled himself, and became obedient unto death, even the death of the cross.

One of the most difficult things for us to do in Kingdom service is in knowing we are sons of God and not letting that go to our heads. Our human side will allow ourselves to see service as being the thing to do and push aside everyone else in order to serve. In reality service is not the thing that comes first, obedience comes first. Obedience to the Lord keeps order and alignment with the will of God.

John 5:30 I can of mine own self do nothing: as I hear, I judge: and my judgment is just; because I seek not mine own will, but the will of the Father which hath sent me.

Ephesians 6:13 Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.

What can I do? I’ve said it, and I think you have also. It is common among people who care to exercise their faith in an effort to see good in this world. After many efforts to help we are often left with this one thought when things do not turn out as we hope. What else can we do? Here in a great set of instructions about spiritual warfare Paul encourages us to stand, having done all.

That still leaves us with a lingering doubt as to what doing all contains. Perhaps it is the lingering doubt that Paul wants us to escape. I don’t have all the answers. I wish I did. I hate to see others in pain, suffering physical and emotional pain. I’ve been there, I know what it feels like. No one likes to feel helpless, yet we often do, not just for ourselves but for others also. Love compels us.

Do we have all gifts? No. We can only use those we have. Have you called in others whose gifts might be useful? Nothing says you have to do it all yourself. Have you gathered prayer partners and set your sights upon the issue? Did you begin with prayer? Often times it helps to begin with prayer. Have you exhausted every human and spiritual avenue available to you? If so, now what?

Stand! It means to not get down. Trust God for the rest. The fact that we haven’t seen the results that we are looking for does not mean God isn’t at work. If you are still not at peace, then look within yourself to discover what God is doing in you to resolve that troubled heart.

Psalm 26:2 Examine me, O Lord, and prove me; try my reins and my heart.