Numbers 30”2 If a man vow a vow unto the Lord, or swear an oath to bind his soul with a bond; he shall not break his word, he shall do according to all that proceedeth out of his mouth.

I find myself in a position to talk about myself. This is my heart and I cannot say how one should or should not deal with this subject. Grace be unto anyone who can relate to my words, my heart and this issue.

I am the Lord’s, I belong to Him. I vowed a vow in my heart to the Lord which He did not ask of me, nor can I say that He encouraged. The vow was of my own making and the Lord is not bound in it. It is of my own making.

I will not blame the enemy of my soul for tempting me to break the vow. I have not broken the vow, but my own words haunt me. This is of my own doing, I have no one to accuse for the thoughts and feeling of my mind and soul.

Circumstance come about where I am reminded of my vow. The Holy Spirit works in my conscience to remind me of my vow. I thank God for His Spirit and those not so gentle reminders, but the vow is mine to own and no one else’s responsibility. Grace and forgiveness are the Lord’s but I cannot see myself breaking my vow with the intention of availing myself of those heavenly gifts. I cannot see myself.

This isn’t about how God sees me, it is about how I see myself. I will not speak to the actions or results of another man’s vow. Those vows do not belong to me. Considering all that I have been through because I made that vow, would I have said it, if I had known these results. Yes.

But I weigh carefully the issues of vows more closely, more thoroughly and with much more respect now. I will not consider any new vow without examining it carefully.

Ecclesiastes 12:11 The words of the wise are as goads, and as nails fastened by the masters of assemblies, which are given from one shepherd.