John 20:4-5 So they ran both together: and the other disciple did outrun Peter, and came first to the sepulchre. And he stooping down, and looking in, saw the linen clothes lying; yet went he not in.

I believe this “other disciple” that outran Peter was John himself. In John’s writings, rather than pointing out his own actions, he would use this term, the other disciple. Given that John wrote his gospel at an old age, he might have forgotten why he had not enter in to investigate further. I can see it being intentional by design.

Having a sign of the resurrection of Christ, what kept you from going in and investigating further? Only you can answer that question for yourself. If I were to tell you what kept me from investigating further, it might taint your recollections. Given it was so long ago, I might not even be honest with myself.

In those moments being honest with ourselves is all we can do. It might not cause us to move forward as Peter did, but John wasn’t Peter. You are not me. You have your own reasons, if you have not sought an answer during your darkest days.

v8 Then went in also that other disciple, which came first to the sepulchre, and he saw, and believed.

Here again, that other disciple, John finally entered in to see for himself. Doesn’t this remind you of two children in a scary situation? “I’m not going in there. You go.” Let someone else take that first risky step.

Anyone out there relate to the need for a wingman? Maybe if things get too scary, you will push them or hide behind them. So much for personal responsibility in relationship, but it is dark and you cannot see.

Will the evening bring any light?